Just Frustrated.

I guess this is the story of my life...I am always frustrated about something.  these days it comes more and more.  I hate how my husband sits in the bed room all day and does nothing, while I am taking care of the kids, the house and doing my homework.  While taking care of everything else.  Then plannign bday parties, pictures, dr appointments and WIC appointments how am I supposed to get everything done alone.  If I go away from the hosue for the day or even just a few hours I come home and it looks like a tornado has gone through my house. 
Then today to top it all off...I was enjoying a little nap on the couch while the kids were watching a movie and behaving and Dad of course was in the bedroom...and then he comes out and says he has to go pick up Ian and Jayk.  both at the same time...that makes 5 smelly boys in my house at the same time...then I have to deal with all three kids because Jayk and Jaymes are in the bedroom...Or the kids come in the bedroom and destroy everything that is put up...because Jaymes and Jayk don't watch them.   Then when Jayk is here I feel like I am invisible.  They sit in the same room as me and totally ignore the fact that I am there...I cook dinner and they eat it and leave me to clean it up...I am 32.5 weeks pregnant and VERY tired.  I feel like I have no energy...But still I have to do everything like normal.  I am just plan frustrated with it all and very tired.  I just need a day off...but then if I leave the house I have twice the stuff to do when I get back...So what the hell!!!  AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!   this is how I freaking feel...!  just plain blah and unwanted.  All i am good for it making their lives better...no I guess making HIS life better.  I love my hubby but sometimes I am just so darn frustrated with everything...
Yea he had an interview on Monday...but then has not looked for any other jobs since then...he just waits to hear from the one joba nd then when they say no he goes to the next...but man we need income NOW!  I hate having to ask for help and hate how it is always ME asking for help or figuring out how to make things work.  I need some help...I have too much on my plate right now and I am frustrated and stressed.  Me asking for help has made other people have issues and stress out and it make me mad that I have to make other peoplele's lives harder. 


once again AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....


Alright...now I am going to try to get some sleep while Jaymes and Jayk are in my bedroom taking louder than needed and one playing the computer and the other the XBOX...How is a girl to get any freaking rest?

Now the kids are up...How freaking wonderful!   I NEED A FREAKING BREAK!!!!!